For many years I have had a very hard time not forgiving myself for things that I said or did that I thought were wrong. I constantly held on to these things and although I know that the Bible says that God forgives me, I could never quite understand it.
Over the past few days I have been soul searching if you want to call it that. I have spent a lot of time in prayer, and seeking for God’s wisdom in some issues that I am going through.
During this time, finally allowed myself to stop beating myself up and I forgave myself for my past sins. I finally ‘GOT’ it! This verse in Isaiah opened my eyes.
‘I, even I, am He who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more.”
Isaiah 43:25
So, if God can forgive my sins AND forget about them, why can’t I give myself a break and let it go? Well, I finally did and I feel much better about myself and my walk with the Lord.
I have been reading verses in my Bible today about being obedient to God and about His peace. This is what I have learned so far today.
I read in 2 Chronicles 14 verses 1-6 about Asa’s reign. My commentary said that Asa’s reign was marked by peace because he “did what was good and right in the eyes of the Lord his God.” Obedience to God leads to peace with God and others. Obeying God is the first step on the path to peace.
As I am more obedient to God, I feel His peace. In John 14:27 Jesus tells us about the peace He leaves us with.
“Peace I leave with you; My peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” John 14:27
The verses in Colossians 3:14-15 talk about how we should live in peace and that it can affect our decisions.
“And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.”
Christians should live in peace. Christians should work together despite their differences. Such love is not a feeling, but a decision to meet others’ needs. To live in peace leads to peace between individuals and among the members of the body of believers.
I have learned a lot over the past few days about my walk with the Lord. I am trying very hard to keep my focus on Him through out the day, and not on issues that might weigh me down.
Do you have a hard time with forgiveness? Is it easy for you to forgive? Have you ever had a difficult time forgiving someone?
Have you ever thought that you had forgiven someone to later find out that you really had not? I am dealing with this right now. I thought that I had forgiven someone that I feel hurt me pretty badly. I finally realized a few days ago that I had not really forgiven this person and that I need to forgive him and give the issue to God.
So, how do you deal with forgiveness? God’s word (The Bible) is very specific on forgiveness. Here are a few verses in Matthew that talk about forgiveness and how the Lord wants US ALL to forgive.
Matthew 18: 21-22
21Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?” 22Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
If someone has hurt you physically, verbally or even mentally how do you deal with it? Do we think just because this person has hurt us, or even continues to hurt us that we don’t need to forgive them? How do you deal with situations like this?
Forgiveness is not always such an easy thing to do. Saying that you always have an easy time forgiving people is a cop out. There will come a day that you will find it hard to forgive someone. You may not even realize that you haven’t forgiven that person.
I can promise you that if you don’t deal with it right away that hurt you initially feel WILL turn into something a LOT bigger and HARDER to deal with. If you are angry with someone and you continue to be angry with them that anger will EAT YOU UP! The anger can also turn into the horrible sin of bitterness.
Bitterness, which I have dealt with more times than I want to admit, is a HORRIBLE feeling. Being bitter can rob you of many things, but mainly it can harm your relationship with the Lord and with those you love and care about.
So, if you are dealing with the hard task of forgiveness, I challenge you to ask the Lord to help you to learn to forgive that person that has hurt you. Just be still and listen, the Lord is waiting to talk to you about it.
I want to leave you with these verses in Matthew 18 that talk about people sinning against each other. Theses verses really made me think this morning.
A Brother Who Sins Against You
Matthew 18:15-20
15“If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. 16But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ 17If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector. 18“I tell you the truth, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.
19“Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. 20For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them.”
May you have a blessed day.
Blessings,
Kim
Check out this video clip done by an awesome group called Onetimeblind. Their videos will really make you stop and think!
I was diagnosed with clinical depression almost eleven years ago. Over the past few weeks I have had highs and lows. Over the past few days I have been in a very, very low spot.
There’s not much I feel like doing….except eating. I use to eat when I was bored, trying to stay awake or even stressed. I feel like now I am eating because I am depressed. I worked pretty hard over the past year to lose 75 pounds, and now to gain back ten pounds….that REALLY SUCKS! It makes me so much more depressed. I have been going to the gym and working out, walking a lot and the other night my husband and I even went running. It helped me to feel great!
One of the main areas I struggle in is friendships. My husband explained to me the other evening (when I was very depressed) the difference between acquaintances, friends and close friends.
I have a bunch of acquaintances. These are those people you may see often but you wouldn’t just call them up to talk with, or hang out with. Then there are the friends, situational friends as my husband called it. These are the people that you see in certain situations.
Examples are those people at church, the ball park, the bowling alley or wherever. These people you could sit and carry on general conversations with, but generally nothing personal.
Then there are close friends. These are the people in your life that you can call up and talk to about anything, hang out with them and do nothing. Those close friends you don’t need a reason to stop by their house. These friends like you for who you are, not what you appear to be. You can be yourself with these close friends.
For the five years that our military family has lived in this town, I have NOT made ANY close friends. I think that I have tried, at least with one person in particular. I really thought that I had made one close friend, but I guess maybe I didn’t. Maybe I didn’t do what is required to keep the friendship going along, or maybe that friend felt like I only wanted something from them. I don’t know what I did or didn’t do, but I have been trying to reach out again, but with no success.
You may remember from some of my previous blogs that I DO NOT make friends easily. This is the BIGGEST area of struggle for me in my life. Even as a kid I had a hard time making friends. I just DO NOT KNOW HOW! I don’t know where to start, how to keep the friendship going, how to handle conflict or what to do when I am having a very difficult day. I am so uncomfortable with groups of people, new people and chatting on the phone with people I don’t know, or know very well.
I am a very introverted person. Here is the definition:
1.
a shy person.
2.
Psychology. a person characterized by concern primarily with his or her own thoughts and feelings (opposed to extrovert ).
These past few weeks haven’t been easy for me. I am not trying to sound whining or anything. I am just very depressed and it really sucks to not have any close friends here. This is one of the major reasons I am ready to move. The other major reason is because I don’t feel part of our BIG church anymore. I don’t think I would even be missed if we left. No one ever says to me when I’m not there, “we missed you at church,” or “How have you been, I haven’t seen you in awhile at church.” No one misses me there. So, why even bother to stay here in this town? The flippin’ church has gotten so darn big that a lot of people feel left out and that no one cares about them.
Probably the only reason I keep going to church there is for my kids. They really like it there. We home school and a lot of their friends go to church there. I wouldn’t want to take them from that church since they love it so much.
Come August when the children’s Sunday school class that Tommy and I teach moves up, we are not going to be teaching anymore. We will probably just come to the later service for the sermon, and our kids can go to their Sunday school class. Why do anything else? Who there would care if we are there or not? It sure doesn’t seem like anyone would!
I am completely ready to leave this place we live N-O-W!!! Maybe I am just running away from my hurt feelings, my emotions… whatever. But I feel like a change would do ME some good. But a move for my husband and kids? That would probably not be good for them.
Who knows what will happen? I’m not sure if we will end up moving or not. I would go in a heartbeat if it was ALL up to me. No one would even miss us here, so why stay?
Dependence. What does that word mean to you? The definition from Dictionary.com that I am talking about says this:
The state of relying on or needing someone or something for aid, support, or the like.
Are you dependent on things, alcohol, drugs or maybe even a person to help you get through your day to day life? I ask this question because I had a “revelation” the other day (if you want to call it that) that made me really realize that I am VERY dependent upon my husband for SO many things.
What things you may ask? Well, there is mainly the psychological dependence I need from him in our marriage. He is who I can lean on when I have had a difficult day. He listens to me when my depression is kicking my butt on any given day. He gives me advice, (not that I always take or like) and he helps me around the house like no man I know. He runs errands for me, so I won’t have to.
My husband is wonderful! MANY, MANY people NEVER see the side of Tommy that I do and I find that very sad. A lot of what some people see is a very structured, military, at times an angry person. That is ONLY what people see on the outside of him. He is a VERY caring, considerate, compassionate and UNDERSTANDING man. I love him with ALL my heart and all my soul.
I realized the other day that I have become VERY, VERY dependent upon my husband for SO many things and this scares me. WHY you ask? I use to be a VERY, VERY independent person. (BEFORE I rededicated my life to the Lord in 1999) I did EVERYTHING on my own. I NEVER asked ANYONE for help. (Yes I was VERY prideful too) I never allowed Tommy to help with anything. Then a little at a time I started allowing him to help me, and all of a sudden I have realized that I am no longer an independent person.
To tell you the truth that scares the CRAP out of me! WHY? What the heck would I do if something happened to my husband? I would be a freakin’ wreck! I don’t think I wouldn’t know how to go on!
Let me say that God is #1 in my life. He has been since 1999 when I rededicated my life back to HIM on a beautiful beach in Guam after watching an ocean Baptism. My husband is #2 in my life, then my kids, then my family and friends in that order. But WHY would I become so dependent on my husband?
Do I not have the kind of relationship with God that I should have? What AM I doing wrong? I don’t know WHY this bothers me so much, but it does.
Maybe it’s because I deal with the difficulty of clinical depression. Maybe that has something to do with it. I have a lot of great days, but I also have many difficult days. EVERY weekend when Tommy is working his second job seem to be the most difficult for me! I am being medically treated for my depression, and it does help, but I KNOW that medication is not “the key” to the problem.
I was so thrilled this week to learn that my husband had passed his Air Force promotion test! On Thursday, May 14th we found out that my husband will become a Master Sergeant!
According to Wikipedia this is how an Air Force enlisted member makes promotion.
“The Numbers
Each year The Air Force determines how many people are needed to be promoted in order to fulfill mission requirements and manning goals as set forth by law and regulation. The Air Force then divides these slots by percentages across its various AFSCswith a few career fields receiving a few extra slots. Therefore each person competing for promotion is really only competing against those in the same Air Force Specialty (AFS).
These numbers are not disclosed until after the tests.
The Points
Everyone who is eligible to compete for promotion receives points based on a number of criteria- Time in Service, Time in Grade, Awards and Decorations, EPR points, PDG points, and SKT points. The points are added up for each person, and the top number of people up to the promotion allowance in each career field are promoted. The score of the last person is known as “the cutoff” which is used as a gauge to see how close those who did not make it came. For example, if 50 1A1s are to be promoted from E-4 to E-5, then the 50 eligible E-4 1A1s with the highest total points will be promoted. Also, everyone else in the Air Force Specialty(AFS) who may test at a later date (for one of several reasons), who also achieve the cutoff score will be promoted as well, which increases the total number of promotees.
Many people believe that the cutoff score is arbitrarily chosen by the Air Force each year, but that is a gross misunderstanding on their part. The cutoff score varies each year because the number of promotion slots varies, and the number of points earned by the top people varies.
Line Numbers
When it is determined who will be promoted, a list is drawn up and each person is assigned a number officially known as “promotion sequence numbers” but commonly called line numbers. As if all the promotees were waiting in a line, the line number says which order one will be promoted. The line numbers are all across the Air Force, not by AFSC. The promotions begin in September and will continue each month on the first of the month for 12 months for SSgts while TSgt and MSgt promotions start in August.
The line numbers are given out according to time in current grade, not by promotion scores, as is frequently perceived.
Fractions of points are awarded for certain categories, resulting in scores that are not whole numbers.
Time in Service and Time in Grade
2 points for each year time in service (max 40 pts) for promotion to SSgt through MSgt
1 point for each year time in service (max 25 pts) for promotion to SMSgt through CMSgt
1/2 point for each month time in grade(max 60 pts)
Awards and decorations
For awards and decorations, a maximum of 25 is points allowed. Point value follow order of precedence.
The maximum for EPRsis 135 points. Take all EPRs from the last 5 years, not to exceed 10 EPRs. Multiply each EPR rating (1 through 5) by the “time weighted factor”:
50 for the most recent report
45 for the next most recent
40 for the next
and so on each time weighted factor decreases by 5 for each report down to a last one of 5 (if there are 10 EPRs). Take the final product from EACH of the reports and multiply each of them by 27. Add all of those products together.
Separately add up the sum of the time weighted factors. Divide the sum products of the reports by the sum of the time weighted factors. This final number is the number of points awarded for EPRs.
Promotion Fitness Examination (PFE)
The PFE is the Promotion Fitness Examination. It is a test whose material is taken from the Professional Development Guide. It is a wide range of information about the US Air Force, and covers topics such as history, organization, regulations, practices, traditions and customs. The test is 100 multiple choice questions. The score one earns on the test is the same number of points awarded (100 maximum).
Skills Knowledge Test (SKT)
The Skills Knowledge Test is a 100 question multiple choice test. The test material is taken from the Career Development Course (CDCs) and applicable Air Force Instructions and Manuals for each AFSC. Members in different AFSCs take different SKTs. The number of points earned on the SKT is the number of points awarded towards promotion (100 maximum).
There are some members who, for one reason or another, do not take the SKT. The common reasons are that they are performing a special duty, and do not have CDCs, or they are in the process of retraining so have not done the CDCs for their new job. Others may not have access to their CDCs for one reason or another. These members take only the PFE and the same score counts in place of the SKT. (So if they earn a 60 on the PFE, it is as if they earn a 60 on the PFE and also a 60 on the SKT.) This is termed either “PFE only” or “SKT exempt”.
Taking the tests is known as “WAPS Testing” or “Promotion Testing”. “
So, as you have read from above, it’s not just “Here take this one test and score good and you will make rank; there is a lot more involved in making rank.
When someone does make rank, it really shows how hard in more than one area that person worked to get there.
I am so proud of my husband for getting his well deserved promotion. He studied very hard and has always given 150% to every aspect of his career in the Air Force. My husband has a very low line number (336). This means he SHOULD put on his new rank on August 1st. It doesn’t hurt either that this promotion comes with a nice big pay raise!
Now that my husband made rank to Master Sergeant, he wants to apply to become a First Sergeant. Or as the Air Force calls it, a “First Shirt.” For the past three years my husband has desired to be a “First Shirt.” You have to be at least a Master Sergeant to become a “First Shirt. “
I was sooooo excited to see how happy he was when he found out he made it. It was terrific! He loves his job and he loves this career the Air Force has allowed him to have.
My husband could retire in a year and a half, but he is not. He is going to stay in as long as possible and try to make Chief; which is the highest enlisted rank in the Air Force. Only two more tests left to become a Chief! Tommy would make an EXCELLENT Chief!
Do you ever hide from others? No, I am not talking about playing, “Hide and Seek.” If you are in a group of unfamiliar people do you socialize or do you keep to yourself and not say much?
Do you make yourself available to others? What I mean by this is, do you allow yourself to be open and honest when you are around friends or even people you don’t know well, or even perfect strangers?
When someone asks you, “How are you doing,” what is your response? Do you say the expected, “I am doing good?” How many times do we say this everyday and just go through the motions with people by saying what they want to hear so we don’t have to be open and honest?
I know that for myself, I so often am just going through the motions. I say what people want to hear because I don’t often want to let people in.
I am a good hider. I hide my feelings, my thoughts and my frustrations from a lot of people. My thoughts and reasons being, that I feel like most people don’t care about what’s REALLY going on with me, so why should I bother them. Also, what good does it do for me to tell people I hardly know about the issues I am going through?
I read an awesome article in the May 2009 issue of HOMELIFE by Christian music artist Brandon Heath. Brandon wrote and recorded one of my favorite songs titled, “Give Me Your Eyes.” In his article, Brandon said the following about how he would make sure he had extra room on his flights.
“We go out of our way to make sure that people stay out of our way. It seems a bit complicated and unnecessary.
About a year ago, in the thick of traveling, I made an observation. I was spending much of my life in places of human intersection with no human interaction. In the middle of thousands of people, sitting only inches away from someone on a plane, I was saying nothing, doing nothing, to share Christ with anyone.
It’s my job and my blessing to share Christ through music, but evidently it wasn’t worthy of my effort. As I began watching people while I waited for my next flight, I saw kids tugging at their parents’ shirts trying to keep up. I observed businessmen on the phone with their wives. I noticed laughter between shoeshine men in the terminals. These people were beautiful. I was embarrassed that I hadn’t noticed them before. I said kind of an unconscious prayer that God would help me to see people the way He sees them.
I was so self-consumed and inwardly focused that I lost the ability to see others with the eyes of Christ.
It became apparent that I was self-serving and neglectful to those around me. I was successfully hiding from others every day. And let me tell you, it was a lonely place to be.
I have friends who desire to know me deeply. But I only share what’s convenient and attractive. They want to see the real picture of who I am, no matter how ugly I think that is. But I’ve begun to appreciate that we all indeed fall short of the glory of God (Rom. 3:23), and that together we can rejoice in our imperfections and further confirm a need for a Savior.
When I wrote the song “Give Me Your Eyes,” it was literally to hold myself accountable to the life God has called me to, and that certainly includes a higher standard of caring for the people around me.
And I’ve noticed something as God has opened my eyes: I have more patience. I have more empathy. Life is more than a flash in the pan; it’s time worth spending, time worth investing. There’s no need to block my seat from a stranger on a plane. We’re members of the same world, created and loved by the same God, who is for us.
I see you. So sit down beside me, and let’s talk. Your story is a little piece of God’s kingdom that I don’t want to miss.”
I read this article and I found myself agreeing with so much of what he said. I find myself doing these same things every day. I may not fly as much as he does, but I do hide myself from people. I don’t allow many people inside. I am not much of a personal sharer.
I have struggled with depression for ten years now and I still have many days when I struggle a lot to even leave the house. Three years ago I was diagnosed as being Bipolar. These things are not easy to share. I have lost many people that I thought were friends because I shared personal issues.
So, if you see me out somewhere or on-line and I don’t talk to you, it maybe that I am hiding myself or having a difficult day. I am a good hider. I need to remember that this is not how Jesus would want me or you to be. He came to give us life. Life to the fullest. We all need to learn to share ourselves more to others. I will try if you will. Deal?
Do you pray? Who do YOU pray to? Have you every prayed out loud? Do you think God hears you when you pray?
Here is what James 5:16 says about prayer:
Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
That verse said that prayer is POWERFUL AND EFFECTIVE! How awesome is that?! God most definitely listens to prayers, answers prayers, and moves in response to prayers.
In Ephesians 6:18 the Bible tells us how we should pray:
And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.
So, in that verse it tells us to be alert and always be praying. God hears us, and He hears all of our prayers, whether or not we pray out loud or just to ourselves.
When we pray we should pray like we are talking to God, just like we’re having a conversation with Him. It doesn’t have to be big and fancy, just honest and forthright.
Matthew 6:7-8 says this about prayer.
And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. 8Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.
Do you ever wonder what to pray about? Sometimes I have to just be quiet, still and listen for God to speak to me.
Philippians 4:6-7
6Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
The power of prayer has overcome enemies (Psalm 6:9-10), , conquered death (2 Kings 4:3-36), brought healing (James 5:14-15), and defeated demons (Mark 9:29). God, through prayer, opens eyes, changes hearts, heals wounds, and grants wisdom (James 1:5).
So, if you pray, know that God DOES hear you, and He does answer your prayers, maybe just not in a way that we thought He would.
Lust is SUCH a destructive sin. It can destroy all things in it’s path if it takes root in your life. It can take hold of anyone: man, woman, or even a teenager.
Once this sin is allowed to develop inside you, it can cause havoc in ones life and those closest to them. It can also be very, very addictive and hard to overcome.
The Bible says this about sexual immorality:
Ephesians 5:3
3But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people.
Why does this type of sin come into our lives? Our world now-days is so desensitized by women and men with little clothing on. Porn and inappropriate behavior is EVERYWHERE: TV, magazines, movies, the INTERNET and the list goes on and on. It’s hard to escape it, even in our own homes.
It has become ok in the world’s eyes to see women and men dress in little to next to nothing. Women dressing in bikinis and men in those horrible speedos, the half shirts, the LOW rider jeans where if someone bends over in front of you, you can see right down the back of their pants, ladies and girls in LOW cut shirts letting ”it” all hang out for the world to see.
I cannot believe that so MANY people, Christians alike think that letting whatever show is ok. Don’t save anything for the bedroom people, just show it all to whoever. NOT!
Who says that this is normal or ok? In my book it is NOT! You might as well be parading around in your underwear. Why not save it for home, for the bedroom, for your husband or wife? And if you’re not married and/or a young person, remember the word moderation. Jesus doesn’t want you showing your body to the world. Your body was created in God’s image and created for your husband or wife.
Genesis 1:27
27 So God created man in his own image,
in the image of God he created him;
male and female he created them.
The whole book of 1 Corinthians chapter 7 is full of GOOD information about marriage. Read these verses about marriage and your body also belonging to your wife or husband:
1 Corinthians 7:4
4The wife’s body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife.
What about us Christian married people? Don’t you think that these images could affect our marriages? It sure can. I imagine that this problem with LUST destroys more marriage than anything else. Lust can also lead to so many other sins. Read this verse about marriage:
Hebrews 13:4
4Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.
Satan wants nothing more than to destroy Christians and their families. I am POSITIVE that the enemy is behind so much, if not all of this lust problem in the world today. I know that so many families are being torn apart by LUST.
Do we care what the Bible even says about lust and sexual immorality? I sure wish more people, especially married Christians cared. Maybe if they did, their marriages wouldn’t be falling apart.
The Bible says this about how God will punish those who sin in such ways:
1 Thessalonians 4:3-8
3It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; 4that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, 5not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; 6and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. 7For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. 8Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you his Holy Spirit.
So, how can we stay on track and keep these thoughts and images from ruining our marriages and possibly even our lives? I don’t know about you, but for me, I am disgusted by it ALL! We have to be! How can it be ok to look at all that garbage and then try to have a relationship with the Lord?
We have to start by being disgusted I think. We can’t allow it in our homes, we can’t allow our children to dress provocative and we surely can’t dress that way either. The word is moderation.
We need to set the standard for our children, especially if we are Christians. (Remember everyone is watching us, especially those you know that aren’t Christians. We may be the ONLY JESUS they EVER see)
Then get rid of all the filth. Read these verses and see what the Bible says:
Romans 6:12-13
12Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires. 13Do not offer the parts of your body to sin, as instruments of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to him as instruments of righteousness.
Proverbs 4:25-27
25 Let your eyes look straight ahead,
fix your gaze directly before you.
26 Make level paths for your feet
and take only ways that are firm.
27 Do not swerve to the right or the left;
keep your foot from evil.
I pray that we all keep our focus on Christ and not of the worldly evils like lust.
May you have a blessed weekend.
Blessings,
Kim
Here is a video by my FAVORITE Christian group, Casting Crowns. The song is called “Slow Fade.” It was in the movie, “Fireproof.”
Here is the lead singer of Casting Crowns, Mark Hall, talking about the song, “Slow Fade.”
Do you find it hard to try to keep in touch with friends? Friends that you may have lived close to for a long time and then one of you had to move?
Well, over the past year I have had a hard time trying to stay in touch with some dear friends we left in Texas.
My husband has been in the Air Force for a little over 18 years and we have lived in many places. Our closest friends we made live in Wichita Falls, Texas. We arrived there in 2000.
My husband taught Tech school at Sheppard Air Force Base for the four years we were stationed there. The weekend we first got to Wichita Falls we went to a small church in Burkburnett, Texas. (Which just happens to be on the border of Texas and Oklahoma)
The church we visited that weekend was “referred” to us by some friends we had met in Guam, where we had just moved from. Our friends in Guam had lived in Wichita Falls right before they came to Guam. What a small world right? I don’t think it’s that small. I think God placed us all there in Guam for a reason.
The church’s name was Jan Lee Baptist Church and it is across the street from Burkburnett High School. If you are ever in the area, stop on by I promise you won’t regret stopping by.
So, we visited Jan Lee that first weekend and were looking for the wonderful people we had been told all about by our friends in Guam. We were so thrilled that we went that Sunday. We continued visiting and before long we made Jan Lee our church home.
Pastor Jim Smithee was the Pastor at the time, and he was a wonderful, Godly man! I learned so much in the three years he was Pastor while we were there. Pastor Smithee had cancer while we were there and in June of 2003 he went home to be with our heavenly Father. It was so hard to be there an entire year after he had passed away. It was very, very hard for me. We use to sit right behind him during the service.
But, I do have to say that during the four years we lived in Texas, I learned a lot about the Lord, and I grew a lot in my walk with HIM. Most of it was due to the friendship I made with Pastor Smithee, his wife and a wonderful, Godly group of ladies.
These ladies and I were part of a Tuesday night Bible study that Pastor’s wife Sue did. It was a small group of us and we got to pray for each other and really study God’s Word. I have not found a more loyal group of ladies or a more REAL Bible study since we left Jan Lee.
I sure do miss Sue a lot. She has had a real hard time over the past six years since Pastor Smithee passed away. I just heard from her yesterday and February 21st was her and Pastor’s 40th wedding anniversary. She still misses him so very, very much. She asked me when the pain would ever end.
There are so many, many more friends from Jan Lee that I miss. Rick Sims was such a blessing to our family, and he may not even knew it at all while we were there. His sports analogies when he did devotions on Wednesday nights or during the monthly Saturday morning Brotherhood breakfast really touched my husband. We ALL miss Rick so very, very much.
But, I would have to say that the closest of our friends that the Lord put in our path while we were there was the Williams family. Oh my gosh, I am tearing up just writing this, thinking about all we went together while in Wichita Falls. My heart breaks to think about their loss of their beautiful son Isaac, two days after 9-11-2001. He would have been two years old five days after his death. I don’t know how you go on after a loss like that, but my wonderful, amazing friends did, and have. I miss April and Jonathan so very much.
The Williams and our family have so much in common , especially since we both have blended families. But the biggest thing we have in common is our love for the Lord.
When you find true Godly friends, the Lord will always help you to remember to stay in touch with those friends. Even though I don’t always get back to Sue’s wonderful, hand written letters as soon as I should, I know that she is still praying for me. She is such a wonderful lady and a terrific friend.
I know that even though April and I may not talk on a daily, weekly or a monthly basis, I know that she is still a great friend and all I have to do is pick up the phone and call her and I know that she will be there to listen, talk and give advice to me. She is a terrific friend who I miss terribly. But, one day whenever we get the chance to be together again, it will be like neither one of us ever left each other.
Love ya April…you’re the greatest friend I have ever had!
If you have dear friends who you haven’t talked to, or e-mailed or written, I challenge you to get back in touch with them. Tell them how much you miss them and how much they mean to you.
Have a blessed Wednesday.
Learning to walk in God’s grace one day at a time,
I started reading the book of James again last night. I learned several things from the first chapter of James. Here they are.
Listening and Doing:
Be quick to listen
Slow to speak
Slow to anger
Get rid of all moral filth
Humbly accept THE WORD planted in you
Do what THE WORD says
Keep a tight rein on your tongue
Look after orphans and widows
Keep oneself from being polluted by the world
Some of my favorite and most useful Bible verses come from this chapter in the book of James.
James 1:19 … Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.
James 1:21 Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you.
James 1:22 Do not merely listen to the Word and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.
I read this chapter of James out of my favorite Bible. It use to belong to a very dear friend. He was our previous Pastor. When we lived in Texas we found this little Southern Baptist Church in Burkburnett, Texas. Jan Lee Baptist Church became our church home during the four years we were stationed at Sheppard Air Force Base in Wichita Falls. Pastor Jim Smithee became like a father to me and taught me many valuable life lessons. He had cancer when we first met him and in June of 2003, a year before we left Texas, Pastor Smithee went home to be with our Heavenly Father.
I felt so close to the Lord last night as I read these verses and I felt like Pastor Smithee was guiding me in what I read as I looked at the chapter and saw the underlined words. It was like he was telling me…. “you KNOW this Kim, you know it.” It was so awesome.
I feel so blessed to have the opportunity to read from Pastor Smithee’s Bible.
I pray that the Lord blesses your day today.
Learning to walk in God’s grace one day at a time,
~~Wednesday, February 25th, 2009~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I have to be honest. I am still learning about God’s grace. I thought I knew all about it. Well, I was wrong. Over the past few months while going through certain trials, I have come to the conclusion that I know very little about walking daily in God’s grace. The Webster Intermediate Dictionary definition of grace is:
· Help given to people by God in overcoming temptation.
· A state of freedom from sin enjoyed through divine grace.
· Kindness, favor
· Approval, acceptance
· A temporary delay granted from the performance of an obligation.
The part of that definition that really sticks out in my mind is “a state of freedom from sin enjoyed through divine grace.” FREEDOM from sin. Being free from my past sins is what I am having a hard time dealing with right now. It seems that even though I have given my life to the Lord, I continually struggle with my past. I feel like a failure so many times in certain areas of my life, so I continually beat myself up about how I use to behave.In Psalm 32:1-3 this is what the Bible says about FORGIVENESS:
Blessed is he
whose transgressions are forgiven,
whose sins are covered.
Blessed is the man
whose sin the LORD does not count against him
and in whose spirit is no deceit.
When I kept silent,
my bones wasted away
through my groaning all day long.
1st John 1:9 says this about FORGIVENESS:
If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.So, if I know this about forgiveness, then why do I still struggle with it? Maybe I still feel guilty? Right now, I am not really sure. It is something that I am working on with God.
Isaiah 43:25 says this about GUILT:
I, even I, am He who blots out
your transgressions, for my own sake,
and remembers your sins no more.
I guess I need to learn some patience with myself. Here is what the Bible says about Patience in James 1:2-4 when I am going through trials and temptations:
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
I need to remember that my STRENGTH comes from the Lord:Psalm 46:1, 11
God is our refuge and strength,
an ever-present help in troubleThe LORD Almighty is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress.
Matthew 11:28-30
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
I need to remember to put my HOPE in God, not myself or anyone or anything else. GOD is the ONLY one that can really help me through the trials of my life.Lamentations 3:22-25 says this about Hope:
Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed,
for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him.” The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him,
to the one who seeks him;
Finally, I need to remember that God is NOT done with me yet. I am not yet COMPLETE. So, these verses in Philippians give me much hope today. I hope that they will help you too.Philippians 1:6
being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
I hope that these verses have helped you as much as they have helped me. Have a blessed Wednesday.Learning to walk in God’s Grace one day at a time,Kim
What happens to us when we can’t give our daily concerns and worries to God? Does it continue to bother you? Do you let it eat away at you throughout the day?
I do sometimes. As someone that deals with clinical depression and Bipolar illness on a daily basis, I often let things get to me and try to deal with them on my own. Do you know what happens to me when I do? It just frustrates me and makes me have a more difficult day.
The Bible says this about our worries in 1 Peter 5:7
“Give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares about what happens to you.”
Sometimes, I don’t feel like anyone cares for me. I know that is not the truth. I KNOW that Satan wants nothing more than for me to believe these lies. The enemy wants me to continue to struggle and worry about these things.
This verse in 1 Peter 1:3a gives me MUCH comfort when I am constantly worrying about things.
“All honor to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, for it is by HIS boundless mercy that God has given us the privilege of being born again.”
How awesome is that? I also try to keep my mind focused on this last verse in 1 Peter 1:13a
“So think clearly and exercise self-control.”
If I can remember that God wants me to think clearly, and remember that He wants me to give HIM all my worries and cares, then I know I am going to be ok.
I pray that you will take heart and remember these verses today. God doesn’t want you to feel guilty about your past failures, so try to forget about them and don’t pick them back up again.
Have a most blessed evening.
Learning to walk in God’s grace one day at a time,
Do you ever wonder if God is still listening to you? I can guarantee if your are HIS child, then He IS still listening to you, and He walks with you daily, even though you may not realize it.
This verse in Deuteronomy tells us that God will never leave us. He is ALWAYS walking with us. No matter how hard things are, or may look.
Deuteronomy 31:6
6 Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”
God wants us to fear Him. He wants us to love Him with everything we have. Read the verse below in Deuteronomy.
Deuteronomy 10:12
What does the LORD your God ask of you but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all his ways, to love him, to serve the LORD your Godwith all your heart and with all your soul.
No matter how hard your life may seem, know that God is always walking with you. He knows the steps of your life even before you are going to take them. Rely on Him today. Let HIM guide you. Let Him walk with you today.
It has been two months since I have blogged on here. I have tried time after time and come up with nothing. It’s like writer’s block I guess. I prayed about it, and this subject came up this morning.
When we go through difficult times in our lives, it’s easy to take our eyes “off the prize.” We often concentrate only on what we are feeling and what we are dealing with at the time. I know that this is often true for me.
In the verses below, Paul talks about suffering. He says that our sufferings are NOTHING compared to what WILL BE REVEALED to us! But, if we wait patiently and in eager expectation for what God is going to do in our lives, like it says in Romans 8 verse 19 and in verse 25 God will give us the glory. That is what Paul is talking about in verses 18 – 27. Paul talks about future glory.
Romans 8:18-19
18I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. 19The creation waits in eager expectation for the sons of God to be revealed.
Romans 8:24-25
24For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? 25But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.
One of my favorite verses in the Bible is where John is talking about The New Jerusalem. Read these verses and take comfort that one day soon our tears and our pain will be gone. There will be NO MORE TEARS! No more suffering and no more trials.
Revelation 21:4
He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.
Jeremy Camp is one of my favorite Christian singers. This man has been through some trials and pain in his young life. He lost his first wife due to Ovarian cancer in the short time they were married. Read what Wikipedia says about them:
Camp has been married twice. He and his first wife, Melissa Lynn Henning-Camp (born October 7, 1979), were married on October 21, 2000.[9] She was diagnosed with ovarian cancer and died in 2001, when he was 23 and she was 21.[9] Some of his early songs reflect the emotional ordeal of her illness. “I Still Believe” was the first song he wrote after her death. “Walk By Faith” was written during their honeymoon.[10] In December of 2003, he married Adrienne Liesching, former frontwoman for The Benjamin Gate. They have two daughters: Isabella Rose Camp (born September 25, 2004) and Arianne Mae Camp (born April 5, 2006).
Take heart if you are suffering. No matter what you are going through, God knows and He is RIGHT there with you … ALL the time. He is walking it right beside you.
Have a very blessed rest of the week.
Blessings,
Kim
Here is Jeremy Camp talking about suffering and hope. And then take a minute and listen to a music video on his newest song, “There Will Be a Day.”
I woke up Saturday morning, December 6th around 5 AM to find our beloved, blind Basset Hound dog had passed away in the middle of the night. Dexter Babe Wright was his name.
Dexter had many nicknames. We would call him Tex Dex, Dexter Texter and Lindsey’s favorite was Dexy.
We got Dexter from a very nice Wichita Falls, Texas policeman eight years ago while we were stationed at Sheppard Air Force Base. Dexter was only six months old when we got him.
At the time we got Dexter, we also had two labs; Sugar and Cocoa. (none of the dogs at the time were neutered or spayed …. so it was inevitable :>) )
In December of 2002, Sugar (our yellow lab) had eleven puppies with Dex as the proud papa. One of the eleven puppies died shortly after birth. We had six yellow puppies and four black puppies. We gave them all away at six weeks old. They were so cute.
When my parents lived at their other home, they had a lot of land, with a pond. We would bring Dexter with us when we would go to their house to visit. This is what they said about Dexter.
“Dexter got to be a “regular dog,” at our house. He would run around with the other dogs around the property.”
“He loved to get into the pond.”
I asked my son, husband and my youngest daughter one or two things they remembered the most about Dexter and here is what they said, and some things I remember. I am also going to go through my pictures and put together a slide show of pictures of Dex and our family over the past eight years.
Kyle said, “Dexter liked to lay by the front door on the big rug waiting for Dad to get home from work.”
My daughter Lindsey said this about Dexter, ” It’s weird, because all the time we have had Dexter, we’ve had all of our other pets.” (The other two dogs and our three small finch birds)
Lindsey also said this, “That no matter what you do, he always let you lay on him.”
Tommy also said, “Dexter would love to run up and down the chain link fence barking at our neighbor’s little dog when we lived in Texas.”
Tommy said, ” Dexter loved to play fetch (before he was completely blind) with the other dogs. He would chase them really fast around the yard in circles.”
Here are some of my memories of Dexter:
I remember how when we lived in Texas, Dexter use to jump up on the bench on our deck (that was attached to our house right by the kitchen) and he would sit outside and look inside at use in the kitchen window. (The window was real low)
My favorite memory of Dexter was watching him “sunbathing” in the backyard on his back and he would roll all around like he was itching his back! He would always groan and make funny noises too as he was rolling around.
I also remember how he would rub his face and the ENTIRE sides of his of body on the couch. I think he was just itching himself! LOL!
Man did Dex have some drool! OH MY GOSH! When EVER Dexter drank EVERYONE in the entire house could hear him. His beautiful, big ‘ole ears would drop into the big water bowl and they would get wet. (Let me tell you here that we live in military base housing with NO carpeting and no area rugs)
After Dexter was done drinking, I would count to see how many seconds it would take for him to shake all that extra water off his face and ears. All that extra water, mixed in with his “lovely” Basset Hound slobber would go F-L-Y-I-N-G everywhere! He didn’t always do the shaking in the kitchen, sometimes he waited until he made it into the dinning room. A LOT of the time we wouldn’t see the “spray” of water and slobber from Dexter shaking off all the extra water and slobber so we ended up stepping it. I can vividly remember stepping in those spots many, many times and saying, “Ewe that is soooo nasty!” The kids would step in it most of the time and run to the front door and wipe their feet off about a million times. (This is where we have the only rug in our home)
Another memory is of our other dog Rusty with Dexter. Over the past few years Rusty has been licking Dexter’s “eye boogers.” That is what we have always called them. It is just nasty to watch! We always tried to get him to stop, but he never did; except on Friday, Dexter’s last day with us.
One lasting memory of Dexter was his howling. He would howl when the kids played the harmonica, or even when we would howl. (We would even put our heads up like he did when he howled) Dexter would keep on howling as long as we did or as long as you kept playing the harmonica.
Dexter was such a neat dog! He just wanted attention and someone to pet him. He was such a great dog and we all already miss him so very much! My heart is breaking every time I go to the backdoor to let my other two dogs outside.
My heart breaks tonight as I watch my ‘ole dog Dexter. Dexter is a big 8 1/2 year old Bassett Hound that we got when he was 6 months old when we lived in Texas.
Let me just say this upfront. Dexter stinks! Literally! Almost all the time. I could bathe him and then 5 minutes later, he will stink just as bad as he did before his bath.
I love Dexter so much. He has been such a good ‘ole faithful dog for the 8 years we have had him. He is almost completely blind now in both eyes, and tonight it seems like it may be the last night he will be with us.
He has no energy, has been throwing up all day off and on, and does nothing but lay around. I know that if it’s his time, then it’s his time. I just pray that the Lord will take him quickly because he is very loved in our family.
I don’t know what else to say because my heart is breaking. I will close for now and pray for the best.
Here is a video clip I put together from my mission trip to Botswana in Africa. The video clip is of a few of our men playing with some of the children in Old Naledi.
As I read yesterday and today in a devotional, it was talking about gratitude and giving thanks. I want to share what the writer of this week’s devotionals shared this morning. It was so awesome! Here it is:
What do I do that matters? Sometimes I ask myself questions like this. Did I end world hunger today? Did I bring an end to war? Did I find a cure for cancer? On and on the questions go, and the answer to each one is, “No.” I want to make a difference. I want to do something that matters, but it’s easy to feel overwhelmed by the world’s need.
I suspect that most people probably want to do something important. In today’s scripture, Jesus is recognizing a group of people who have made a difference. Jesus isn’t interested in their popularity or money. He doesn’t even mention their church attendance or how many times a week they read their Bibles. According to Jesus, these people have made a difference because they offered their food, drink, friendship, clothing and care to people who didn’t seem matter to the rest of the world.
We may not save the world today, but maybe we can give what we have to help someone who seems not to matter much. In God’s eyes, when we care for someone who seems unimportant, we are caring for Jesus. I’m pretty sure that matters a lot.
Dixie Ford
“When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, then he will sit on the throne of his glory. All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats, and he will put the sheep at his right hand and the goats at the left. Then the king will say to those at his right hand, ‘Come, you that are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world; for I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, I was naked and you gave me clothing, I was sick and you took care of me, I was in prison and you visited me.’”
Matthew 25:31-36
“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when was it that we saw you hungry and gave you food, or thirsty and gave you something to drink? And when was it that we saw you a stranger and welcomed you, or naked and gave you clothing? And when was it that we saw you sick or in prison and visited you?’ And the king will answer them, ‘Truly I tell you, just as you did it to one of the least of these who are members of my family, you did it to me.’”
Matthew 25:37-40
O give thanks to the Lord, call on his name, make known his deeds among the peoples. Sing to him, sing praises to him; tell of all his wonderful works. Glory in his holy name; let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice. Psalm 105:1-3
So, this Thansgiving, remember what Jesus says in these verses, what IS important is being there for your friends and strangers and giving of yourself and what you have to share. May you have a blessed Thanksgiving!
This picture was taken by my oldest daughter in Charleston, SC. 12-2007
Have you ever tried to walk in a dark room, only to stub your foot on something very large and heavy? It’s not easy to maneuver around in the dark, unless you have some light. In our home at night, I leave the bathroom light on in the hallway, in case one of the kids needs to get up in the middle of the night. This way, there is a little light shining into their bedrooms.
Without the Lord in our lives we are totally in the dark. There is no light. Nothing.
As I was reading in my Bible this morning, I read some awesome verses about the light and wanted to share them with you.
“ … God is light; in Him there is no darkness at all.” 1 John 1:5
Did you read that like I did? There is NO darkness in God, NONE…. ZILCH, ZIP-PO! God is L-I-G-H-T!
“If we claim to have fellowship with Him, yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth.”1 John 1:6
So, what is that verse saying to you? To ME it is saying this …. if I claim to be a Christian and a follower of Jesus Christ, and I do things that are the opposite of HIS teachings, then I AM walking in the darkness and I am living a lie.
“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”1 John 1:9
If God is the light, why are there so many Christians walking in the darkness? Good thought to think about today. May the Lord bless your day today.
